Should You Compare Your Marriage?

If there’s anything I know to be true, it’s this: comparing your marriage to someone else’s is foolish.

I remember one day 10 years ago when I saw a couple I knew looking and acting sweet as usual, in their matching t-shirts and sneakers, and whispered a prayer to God about wanting my future marriage to be like theirs. A prayer that God, in His infinite mercy and wisdom, did not answer. I was shocked to realise later just how much pain and suffering lay underneath the façade, and even as I prayed for their healing and restoration, I retracted my previous prayer. Never again!

Today, after being married for a few years and having been thrust into “married circles” almost from day one, I know for a fact that no matter how close you think you are to a couple, it’s never a good idea compare your marriage to theirs; not just because of the dangers of comparison, but also because you simply do not know what their marriage is actually like.

From where you stand their marriage may appear sexier, more interesting, more modern, even more spirituality intimate than your own. Continue reading…

Advertisement

Is Your Togetherness Too Total?

Does a happy marriage mean being inseparable?

Elizabeth Taylor, who married Richard Burton in 1964, divorced him 10 years later, and married him again in 1975 before they divorced for good less than a year later, once described their marriage as “being in each other’s pockets.” Read more…

7 Things Great Wives Do Differently

We’re all still basking in the euphoria of the love, friendship and honour we witnessed between Barack and Michelle Obama as they spent their final days in office, and there was much “goals-ing” all over social media. Many have also wondered, secretly if not openly, what wives who live happy, fulfilled lives even as they make their husbands happy, do differently.

I decided it was certainly something worth looking into, and apart from making sure you marry a worthy husband (without this you’re in for a rough ride regardless of whatever else you do), here are 7 things great wives do:

Too Much Togetherness Can Kill Your Marriage

Is your spouse your only source of love and comfort? That’s not intimacy, that’s too much responsibility to place on one person. I often say, if you don’t know how to make yourself happy, don’t marry. You should know your happy place and be able to pick yourself up.

If you’re still single, please stop waiting for someone to come and complete you. Be whole, learn how to nourish yourself, and build a robust, satisfying life. Read more…