Already Full

I am a finite being; this reality never dawned on me until recently. I kind of always knew, naturally, but today it hit me in a very tangible way. My capacity (be it emotional, relational, or physical) is finite.

First, one of my devotional readings for that day (Authentic Fasting by James McDonald) pointed out that it’s not that I’m not hungry for God; I’m just not hungry enough. And that’s because I’m full of many other things- including food.

Then I set out to drink 2.5 litres of water daily and I realised I simply could not eat as much as I had been eating if I wanted to be able to take in more water (my water drinking habits are notoriously poor) than I’m used to.

And I realised it’s the same thing in other areas of life. It’s the reason why there’s a book titled “Excessive Sleep, Killer of Destiny.” We have only 24 hours in a day and we must prioritize the things that really matter.

Even our affections are finite. You can’t love a husband or wife fully without first “forsaking all others” and emptying yourself of affections and addictions foreign to your marriage (you can try though, if you’re naive enough!).

You can’t serve two masters either.‎ That’s why I particularly loved the prayer at the end of that day’s reading:

Prayer – Father, I am a finite being. I can only do so much, and take in so much. Forgive my tendency to use my time and capacity on things that draw me away from nurturing my hunger for You. Give me such hunger for You I cannot help but put away that which does not satisfy. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

 

 

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